Since Mike and I got engaged a few months ago, I’ve referred to him as:
- My husband-to-be
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My future husband
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The guy I’m marrying
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My boyfriend
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My man
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The future Mr. Lawson
Just kidding about the last one.
One term I haven’t used is “my fiance.” To me, it comes across as obnoxious, stuffy and fussy, and there’s something smug about it that makes me uncomfortable. Just using the term would make me feel like I’m flaunting my relationship status as if it were a status symbol used to impress people at a party, as the Seinfeld clip above shows.
I’m not the only one who feels this way. Jezebel and other online publications have also expressed disdain for the F Word.
So, are the alternatives? Sure, there’s “betrothed” and “intended,” but they’re even more douchebaggy than “fiance.” I kind of like “significant other” because it’s sufficiently vague, but it’s also clinical-sounding and, at six syllables, sort of a mouthful. There’s always “partner,” but that’s somehow not specific enough because we could have different types of partners (business, etc.)
How do you feel about “fiance”? Do you feel like you should be eating a crepe and sipping cafe au lait when you say it, or am I just being weird?

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