When I met my future husband, we were immediately inseparable. But we almost didn’t meet. In fact, I cancelled the first date we had scheduled.
Like many people, we met through an online dating site. I didn’t spend a lot of time on it and I never contacted anyone first. My approach was to create a profile then just read any messages that would come in. I deleted 99.9% of them.
Mike reached out to me in February 2012 and I replied. I thought he was cute and funny and one of his photos was of him smiling and opening a Tofurky box on Thanksgiving. Sold. We arranged to meet.
But, it didn’t happen. I cancelled because someone I had dated previously talked me into “giving it one more try.” Stupidly, I agreed to reconnect with this person, who was someone I didn’t love nor did I even really like. It was a miserable slog that finally ended after a few months, in the beginning of July, to my relief.
For a few weeks, I thought about reaching out to Mike. I kept going back and forth. Would he reply to my email? Would he want to hear from me? Even though he was gracious when I cancelled, I still felt awful about it. I decided not to contact him.
Then, one Saturday afternoon at the end of July, I had a complete change of heart. I realized I couldn’t stop thinking about Mike, and I really had nothing to lose. So I took a chance. I opened my laptop and emailed him, saying I wasn’t sure if he remembered me, but I was wondering if he’d give me another chance. I felt utterly vulnerable and scared shitless.
Then I refreshed my email every few minutes. Finally, he replied!
He said of course he remembered me, and was just thinking about me the other day. We made plans to meet on Aug. 1, 2012 at Devil’s Den at 11th and Ellsworth in South Philly.
I walked in and he was sitting in the back. I immediately recognized him, and boy, was he good-looking! He stood up and we hugged and talked for the next few hours.
Then he walked me part of the way home, and we kissed on a South Philly street corner.
We were in each others’ lives from then on. And tomorrow we’ll say our vows.
Reaching out to Mike and admitting I’d made a mistake was the best decision I ever made. Where would I be right now if I hadn’t?
“I urge you to please notice when you are happy, and exclaim or murmur or think at some point, ‘If this isn’t nice, I don’t know what is.”
― Kurt Vonnegut